Feeling anxious about staying relaxed

Crazy isnt it!?!

I am now finding myself being anxious about trying to relax and not think about the whole IVF thing in an attempt to get my body to work in a timely fashion this month so we can get started. Ahhhhhh!!!

At least I know that for me, any physical, emotional or mental stress interferes with my hormones and consequently my cycles and ability to ovulate. So no doubt also has a massive effect on whether I can conceive or not. Im doomed!

I can completely see why people say to stop trying and it will happen - i.e. no longer stressed about it. But in practice that is absolutely impossible. Its like giving up on a dream. If you think there is a chance then of course you are going to try. I cant imagine how you can stop trying. After IVF failed the last time, I definitely relaxed a great deal about it for the last 9 months, buts its always at the back of your mind. You cant stop watching your cycles. 

I think the only way you can truy relax about it is if you have been told it is impossible and so there is then no point trying. Or it has gone on for so long, you really have accepted that its not going to happen and move on to alternatives such as adoption.

So, to think positively, I am trying to eliminate stress for the next two months, though its easier said than done.  I have actually told my line manager this time and she seems quite supportive and understands I need to scale things back a bit. I will climb no mountains, I learnt my lesson last month! And I will try not to engage in anything that could be emotionally challenging, not sure how yet though.

Fingers crossed!